Magic in the Air

Red Magic that is! Canby U11 8 v 8 Tournament Champions!
They won their first game this morning 5-1 or something like that. And then they won their second game 7-0. They were up 5-0 at the half and then pulled their goalie and two players to finish out the game 5 v 8! This was the best I've seen them play/pass I think. They really played like a team!!! So proud of the girls! Magic definately was in the air today!
This girl loves the game of soccer....
They all celebrated after the game with a spin fest on the playground. I don't think I've ever seen so many happy (and green!) faces in one place!!! Players and siblings were celebrating in style!

Just another day at the office....

Fun way to spend a weekend, but a busy one! Didn't get a thing done this weekend except play with friends, take photos, cheer on the Magic and spectate. Tomorrow chemo rolls around and I'm not looking forward to it. Chemo weeks are long and the inbetween weeks are so short!! Where's the fairness in that? Have another soccer tourney next weekend in West Linn.

Hope your Mondays Rock!!!

xoxox
Shauna

The Richest Woman in the World!!!!

I've got friends from out of town coming out of my ears!! How lucky am I???? I'm the luckiest girl in the world!!! And the richest when it comes to friends.

Last weekend several girls from an online Scrapbooking community, The Cropping Cactus, that I have belonged to for about 10 years, flew into town from all over and spent several days blessing us with their presence. The group gets together annually and have held gatherings in several places over the years: Arizona, Vegas, California to name a few. I remember one year we spent the days right after 9/11 together. That was a powerful one. This year the group voted on where to hold the gathering and Oregon won!! I was so grateful as it's not good to fly when you're undergoing chemo due to the germs in the stuffy plane and hotel, and even after doing chemo due to lymphadema (swelling). So Shanna flew in from California, Ali flew in from Utah and Angie flew in from Indiana,Michelle and Heidi flew in from Arizona and then Laura, and Paris and I joined them for loads of fun! We had dinner at Chevy's and they pretended it was my birthday, and it was so funny because we passed around the hat and dessert and we all took photos with them!It was a nice way to end a hard chemo week. Laughter is definately the best medicine and I haven't laughed so long or hard since I can't remember when!!! Just what the doctor ordered.

Don't forget our night to "So You Think You Can Dance" with our dear friends the Wilsons and crew on Sunday nightAnd then I told you all about my friend Sheila from UCLA who flew into town on Wednesday from Seattle. Such a treat and a good way to get over the "hump".And if that isn't enough, I get a call from Loni, one of my bestest friends since 8th Grade, asking if I'm free on Saturday! So to cap off the week of friendfest, Loni and her family came down from Seattle and over today and took us to Pizzacato for dinner!You'll notice my kids aren't in the photo. One is 13 and thinks he's too cool and Kaelin is the stellar photographer!!!!

If all that doesn't make me the luckiest girl in the world, add the lunch date I had with my friend, Yayoi on Thursday and the time I spent with my friend, Elizabeth on Friday morning, plus all of the wonderful emails, texts, phone calls and posts on my blog and I'd say I'm spoiled rotten to the core with wonderful friends!!! Thank you all for making my life so full and rich!!!

To top off our busy week, Spencer had an overnight trip with his 8th grade class to Silver Falls Wednesday and Thursday and then today we had 4 soccer games to spectate! We had to divide and conquer!

Dave took Spencer to his two games, which he tied 1-1 (he was the assist!) and won 3-0 (scoring a goal) and I took Kaelin to her U11 tournament game in Canby, where they won 6-0 and then to her U12 league game, which they won 5-0. Kaelin enjoyed playing "Stopper" immensely. (Whatever that is??? lol). I'm going to nickname her "Sassquach" and call her "Big Foot" for short! LOL!Thanks to Stan and Allen from HOTP (my former work) for coming out to watch Kaelin play today (since they live just down the street!). We'll be back at the park at 8am tomorrow morning for another game and then we'll see where we fall in the championship brackets! So another day spent on the field! But I love it! And so does Kaelin, who when told she was playing in a tournament this weekend asked " Is that where we play more than one game?" and after I said yes, she pumps her arms and says "YES!!!!!!!" excitedly!!!! So bring it on!!!!! Bring on the teammates and parents/friends on the sidelines!

Have a great Sunday!!!!
xoxox
Shauna

More Writing

prompt: Moving In

Moving In
by Shauna Berglund Immel

I'm not exactly sure of the exact date when he moved in. He just showed up one day, unannounced. Dumping all of his excess baggage on the floor in a pile in the middle of the room. A jesture saying "I'm here to stay." Whether we liked it or not.

We didn't want him here. We were perfectly happy and content with the way things were. We wondered how long he was going to stay and how soon he'd wear out his welcome.

Two years later, he's still with us, one of those guests who have intruded on your life and overstayed their welcome. He has moved into our house and settled in like he owns the place now.

Taking over like the cancer that he is.

This next one is a dialog/conversation prompt: Tell Me...

Tell Me a Story
by Shauna Berglund Immel

"Tell me a story Daddy." The little girl asked in her high pitched voice full of innocence and curiosity as she crawled under her favorite blanket and curled up in anticipation under the safe crook of her dad's arm.

"What story would you like to hear tonight Little One?"

"My favorite one Daddy."

"And which one is that my love?"

"The one about the beautiful angel, Daddy."

"But you've heard that story every single night since...." his voice trailed off.

"Don't you want to hear another story? Perhaps one about a beautiful young princess?"

"No Daddy, I want to hear the story about the beautiful young angel."

"Are you sure you don't want to hear the story about the little girl who grows up to be a beautiful princess, finds her true love and lives happily ever after?"

"No Daddy. I want to hear the story about the beautiful angel who goes up to heaven and gets her wings. You know the one. The one about Momma. It's my favorite."

She snuggles in close and he pulls up her blanket to tuck her in. The one that used to be her mother's favorite. The one her mother inherited after her grandmother died.

He leans down and kisses his daughter softly on the forehead and begins the story. Her favorite story. The one about the beautiful angel that he has told night after night after night. The one he knows by heart. The one about her mother.

"It's my favorite too."

Thanks for reading...
Have a wonderful weekend full of friends and family and fun!
We have a weekend full of soccer tournies and games!
I'll post photos and try to get caught up this weekend!
Not looking forward to Monday....Chemo Monday. :(
I am looking forward to seeing my friend Loni who's coming into town with her family tomorrow!!!

xoxox
Shauna

Up All Night

Here's a piece I wrote last week in my Write Around Portland Writing Group. We've met twice now and it's held out at the Quest Center on Burnside/29th. It's an interesting blend of ladies who are battling cancer, HIV, mental illness and addiction. They all write so incredibly. This session is a ten week session again. I've missed writing like this so much. It's so nice to have time again, to make time. My writing is usually dark, but it's how I deal with things. Things I can't say to my family and friends. Things that might scare them if coming from my mouth out loud. It gives me a safe place to dump my worries and exorcise my demons.

Last week's writing prompt: "Up All Night" or as I titled it,

"An Univited Guest" or do you like "Sleeping with the Enemy" better?
by Shauna Berglund Immel

Night falls.
The house falls silent.
I am alone.
Quiet.
Still.
With no distractions.
Only my thoughts and the sound of my breath.

This is the point at which fear finds me.
An unwanted and unwelcome guest
Who slips into my bed uninvited and breaks the silence.
Filling my head with insecurities, sorrow and dread.
He haunts my thoughts like a ghost.
Terrorizing me and inflicting unimaginable emotional pain.

You know that pain.

The kind that you feel deep in your heart
Down to the very core.
The very essence and being of your soul.
The kind that makes your heart skip a beat.
The kind that takes your breath away.
The kind that scares you so badly,
you break down in heavy,
gut wrenching sobs
that leave your sides aching
and your pillow soaked.

You don't want night to come.
You are afraid of what it brings.
You want to stretch the day out
as long as you can.

To get as much living in as possible.
To get as much done as you possibly can.
To tie up loose ends.
To work on unfinished business.

In case tomorrow doesn't come
to rescue you from the darkness.

To avoid having to lay down next to fear,
Who often stays all night long.

Fall Breezed in today

One of my best friends, fellow UCLA Pi Beta Phi sorority sister and roommate, Sheila, flew in from Seattle today and took the Max train to Beaverton to spend the day with me! I can't tell you how good it was to see her and how much fun it was to walk down memory lane and to catch up. She looks fabulous and I loved hearing all about her life! Some of my very best and favorite memories include her. We had so much fun in college together, with our 2 other friends, Rachel and Joni. We referred to ourselves as "The Four Seasons" because we completed each other and together we were magic! She was "Fall" and I was "Summer." Here's a photo of us after a day of enjoying Noah's Bagels, long talks at Starbucks drinking Chai Tea Lattes with Soy, and a stop at Border's Books before getting on the Max to head back to the airport...

Isn't she gorgeous? I love and adore this girl! Thanks for the girlfriend getaway today!! And thanks for the gift bag of fabulous goodies! Great to see you! I'll be texting you soon!!!! :)

xxoxoxo
Shauna

CA125 Results

from my doctor:

Yes, good news, the result from 9/16/08 is stable at 32.

JL

:) normal is 35 or below.

xoxox
Shauna

So You Think You Can Dance????

These girls do!!!

Kaelin and I went to see "So You Think You Can Dance" tour at The Rose Garden last night with Alaina, Jacie, Alexandra and their friends the Bluhms. What fun we all had! It was amazing! We had fun running into the Haywards while we were there! Kaelin got a "Twitch" T-shirt and wore it right away. Twitch is one of her favorite dancers, along with Chelsea, Carrington and Gev. It's funny because at the Hannah Montana Concert, Kaelin wouldn't let me buy her a t-shirt, no matter how hard I begged!! People might think she likes girl stuff of something??? But she let me buy her this t-shirt and she put it on right away and wore it to school the next day! It was a great way to wrap up an action packed, fun filled weekend chalk full of friends and fun!

I've got to get to bed, but I will post photos of my weekend with the out of town girls soon! I haven't laughed that long, hard or much since I don't know when. I'm talking laugh til you cry and til your sides ache.

Have a Great week!
xoxo
Shauna

Catlin Soccer

Spencer's middle school 8th grade team lost their game today, 3-0. Their record is now 2-1. I got some good shots though! Catlin has the best field to play on and the day was overcast, so perfect for photos! It's nice to see a smile on Spencer's face, even with the loss. It means he's having fun and maybe has found his passion again. Makes my heart smile to see that grin. :)

Here's a photo showing how much bigger and older looking the other team/players were/are!
Here's a good one of Spencer taking the ball away from someone...
We've got another game tomorrow night. I have my Write Around Portland Writing Group, Kaelin has the OES/Catlin Homecoming Game and I am having dinner with my girlfriends that are in town! Woo Hoo! I should have some fun photos to post tomorrow night!

Had Back to School night for Kaelin tonight. With all that was going on, I was 1.5 hours late, but it still went til 915pm so I didn't miss much (I hope!). I was so excited there was food left since I didn't have dinner! And I have to get Susie's recipe for her Banana Pudding dessert...OMG that rocked!!!! Total and complete comfort food.

Now I am toast. Need to stay up and label all of my items for the Life's a Scrapbook garage sale that starts tomorrow. Not sure I have it in me tonight. Supposed to meet the girls at 930am to drop off the items. Trying not to stress over it. I just need to get my bum out to the garage and start labeling! I'm sure it will go faster than I expect. Although the only thing I want to do is crawl in bed, do my crossword puzzle and go to sleep!!! I'm beat. We'll see what wins out.

Have a great Friday everyone!!!!!

xoxox
Shauna

Would you like some whine with that chemo???

Photo is from the Relay for Life 2007 I participated in.

I'm so sick of chemo. I know you are getting tired of hearing me moan and groan about it. This happens about oh, once every two weeks, when it's time to do chemo again. This was round 9 of 12 and when I mentioned that to my oncologist, she mentioned that we probably don't want to do what we did before after I finished my 11/12 rounds (my naropathy got so bad I couldn't go all 12) of the same chemo in 06-07. When we stopped the nasty stuff and just continued with the avastin, which keeps the blood vessels from forming. It was such a nice break then. It was less often and for shorter periods of time. No nasty side effects. No pump to bring home. I almost felt normal. ALMOST. But it didn't last long and the cancer came back with avengence. So they tried other chemos and those didn't work so they went back to the orignal cocktail, the Folfox. That's what I've been doing every other week. Anyways, the doctor said we didn't want to do avastin only again, because that didn't prove effective before. She mentioned trying other chemos instead. Hello??? I thought when we reached 12 rounds I'd get a break. Not just a break from the folfox, but a break break. Now it sounds like we'll just move onto something else. With different side effects. It's because my CT scans are only "stable" and not resolving themselves I suppose. I just am not sure I can keep on keeping on doing this chemo song and dance like I have been. I am tired, mentally and physically. It's really starting to take it's toll. It's getting harder and harder each round. I'm getting tireder and tireder each round. And I can't get any sort of routine going because every other week it's interrupted with freaking chemo!!! I'm soooo sick of it all!!!! Please just make it go away!!!! Wish it was that simple. I really do. Ok, so enough moaning and groaning.

I slept solid from 2am last night until 1230pm today! Dave took over all of the responsibilities and just let me sleep. Which I so needed and was so grateful for. Sometimes I wish I could just sleep through the whole 46 hours that I have this stupid pump for. I'll be glad to get rid of him tomorrow at 11. See ya!!! Bu-bye!!! Don't let the door hit you in the @$$ on the way out. (sorry if I offended anyone with that).

A little catch up from the weekend:

Saturday Kaelin's team won their game.
Spencer's team won one game and lost one.

They both had team pictures on Saturday.
Sunday we went to a 4th grade swim party.

Tuesday Spencer's 8th Grade Catlin Gabel team won their game.

I'm excited that my girlfriends from Arizona, California, Utah and Indiana are flying in over the next few days! I'm a tired, busy mom, but I'm going to try and fire up to enjoy our time together. Thursday night is back to school night sans kids, from 6-9pm. Spencer has a soccer game before hand at 415pm. Kaelin has gym 6-9pm, so that covers babysitting! Friday Spencer has another game and Saturday we have 3 soccer games and Sunday night is "So You Think You Can Dance" tour! So excited for the whole weekend! Living a lot of life this weekend! Bring it on!!!

I hope you all live your lives to the fullest this weekend too!

xoxox
Shauna

p.s. So embarrassed by my UCLA Bruins loss to BYU 0-59 last weekend!!!! Please dont' throw that in my face when you see me Ali!!!!!

Chemo Round 9

Tuesday is my 9th of 12 rounds.
Will try and catch you all up tomorrow and post photos from the weekend.

Got a busy week ahead. Spencer had Catlin Gabel soccer practice tonight, he has a Catlin game tomorrow and then Modoc soccer practice Wed. and then Catlin soccer games Thurs. and Friday and 2 Modoc soccer games on Sat.

Kaelin had gymnastics tonight, she has soccer practice tomorrow night, Elite Acrobatics on Wed., Rhythmic Gymnastics on Thursday and she's skipping gym on Friday to go to the OES Homecoming game vs Catlin with her good friend Alaina from Gym/dance. Saturday she has a soccer game and then Sunday her and I are going to "So You Think You CAn Dance" at the Rose Garden with Alaina and her mom.

I've got a bunch of scrapbooking girlfriends coming in Thursday and Friday from Indiana, Arizona, California and Utah. Can't wait for some girl playtime! Just hope I can kick the chemo blues by then. We're not going to do any scrapbooking, just touristy stuff and dinner and maybe a movie and some fun, laugh your bum off time together. I might even get a room in the hotel so I can feel like I've gotten away too.

I'll try and be better with my blogging this week. The start of school is really kicking my tushy!

xoxo
Shauna

The Results are In

09/10/08 CT Scan Results:

Hello, I did not get results back until today. Good news, everything is stable. There continues to be a small amount of tissue thickening in the upper abdomen between the stomach and colon, and a small amount of thickening around the bladder. No progression of these areas, and no new changes. Overall I would consider this stable and continued evidence of response to treatment. I will send you a copy of the full report. I hope you are feeling well.

JL

7/03/08 Ct Scan results

I don't like the "thickening" part, but I'll take it. Can't complain too much.

xoxox
Shauna

Hanginig Up My Cape

Never heard from my oncologist today in re: my ct scan.

Spencer's doctor appt. went well. The lump in his chest is symmetrical and right under his nipple. She said it's normal for pre-puberty boys to get that. It might come and go and as long as it's not changing shape and moving from below his nipple, he should be fine. So now he can put his mind to ease and stop worrying about having cancer. He weighed a whopping 91# today by the way.

Got a text from Trea and Travis...they're having a girl!! Due Feb. 3rd! (did I get that right Travis?) Congrats!!! Team Immel is so excited for Baby Connick! Bring it on!!!!

Signed up for another writing workshop with Write Around Portland (I think I'm the poster child for them!) that starts tomorrow and runs every Friday 11-1pm for 10 weeks!

Hanging up my cape now after a Supermom day.

Here's a crazy review of my day:

715am drug my sorry butt out of bed after a bad nights sleep
815 took the kids to school.
815-915am walked the track with Paris.
Had coffee and pumpkin loaf with Paris at Border's Books.
Read the newspaper, did the crossword puzzles and took a nap with Simba.
130pm Went shopping for food for Back to School Night (veggie tray, fruit salad and my new favorite pot luck accessory...cream puffs!).
230pm Dropped off food at school.
300pm Took both kids out of school a bit early to get to doc appt.
330pm Doctor's Appt.
Took them to Subway to get "dinner".
415pm Dropped Spencer off at school for his game.
445pm Dropped Kaelin off at Gymnastics across town. (an hour early for her 6-9pm class).
500pm Went back to school to watch Spencer's Middle School Soccer game (they won 6-2!)
Missed the Japanese Trip Meeting because the game started late
Missed the Back to School night feast because it was all gone!!!
7pm Joined Back to School Night late and Spencer went to a study hall
9pm My mom picked up Kaelin for me from gymnastics.
915pm End of Back to School Night
940pm Drove thru Dairy Queen because I promised the kids Blizzards.
10pm Arrived home grumpy, tired, and hungry.
1030pm Blogging and hoping Spencer finishes his homework soon....

Whew. Gotta love days like today though - so full of life!!!!!!!

And the weather today....GLORIOUS!

And TGIF!!!!!!

xoxox
Shauna

p.s. Taking a moment of silence today to remember those lost and affected by the 9/11 tragedy. I'll never forget that day. God Bless America one and all.

Spring in Japan (sounds nice eh?)

Got an email from Spencer's Japanese teacher:

I am writing this email to give you some great news. As you may have heard, the Middle School Japan Trip is happening this Spring. Even though there is still quite a bit of logistics to work out, I am very excited to have the chance to take your kids over there. We will be focusing our trip in the island of Kyushu (southernmost major island) and will be in Japan from March 12th to 25th (depending on flights). We have a huge numbers of activities planned which range from climbing a volcano and visiting a wild monkey park, to hands-on workshops on soba making, to watching the 2009 spring sumo championships, to also visiting Nagasaki. Most importantly, thanks to huge help from Rieko Mine, we will be spending four days with a middle-school in Takeo, Japan in both their school and at a day camp. It is going to be a blast and a wonderful learning experience for your student.

This is something that Spencer really wants to do and we'd love for him to be able to do it. However, we are going to have to start a serious fundraising drive for him to accomplish it. He'll have to get creative with it. I'm just warning you that he may be hitting you all up at some point. If you're wondering what to get him for Christmas this year, a contribution to his trip would be awesome!

Dave asked me if I wanted to go. I have no idea what the future brings for me by March, so I hate to make any commitments or get my hopes up. If I'm undergoing chemo, not sure flying on a plane in an enclosed space with all of those people and germs a plenty would be my best bet. Also I think I need to be careful with lymphadema or something when flying as well? In any case, it would be a great opportunity to actually see part of the world and to share a wonderful experience with my son, so I'll think about it. Flying in my condition and being so far from home scares me. But when else would I get a chance like that? Not ever sure if they are looking for chaperones. We'll see how it all plays out.

As for my CT SCan today. It went well. Quick and painless. Just annoying. It does help to mix up those crap, er I mean, Prep drinks the night before and let them chill in the fridge overnight. Less lumpy but still nasty. Drank 15oz at 705am and then another 15oz at 820am. Checked in at 905am. Got injected with dye and was done home by 1015am. Had to stop and treat myself to my favorite coffee drink after that. I'm going to skip my support group for the 3rd week in a row. We've lost 3-4 people in the last month and I just can't bring myself to face the group/room without some of my favorite people there. I can't handle the doom and gloom. Next week I need to make sure I go so I can speak about Betsy when they pass the candle for her. Today I think I'm going to pass and go take a nap. Haven't been sleeping welll and I think all of the walking with Paris lately is really wearing me out.

Have a 140pm parent teacher conference with Kaelin's teacher today. Then we have soccer and elite acrobatics. We all should be home by 830pm tonight.

Thanks for all of the words of support etc. I'll let you know when I receive my CT Scan results. Hoping for the best news ever.

xoxox
Shauna

CT Scan time again

Ugh. Seems like I just had one. My appt. is tomorrow at 9am. At least I won't have to fast all day first like last time since it's first thing in the am. The doctor wanted to see if there is any change with stopping the oxcilliplatin (the drug I developed an allergy to after all this time). The last scan was to establish a baseline before going without the oxcilliplatin. Dave feels like it's going to be good news. I HATE getting these scans. Afraid of what they may find. Afraid to get my hopes up. And I HATE drinking that prep drink!!! Ewww. I'm sure so many CT Scans can't be all that good for you either, since they inject you with radioactive dye! :( But what is a girl to do??? Gotta be a good cancer patient and follow the doctor's orders.

Spencer has an appt. with the doctor on Thursday because he has a lump on his chest that he's freaking out over, afraid he may have cancer. Could be puberty or something, so I told him not to worry. But he's freaked out so we're going to get it looked at so he can put his mind and imagination at ease.

Cross your heart, eyes, legs, fingers and toes for us both this week! Thanks!

xoxox
Shauna

Another Angel in Heaven

Betsy, from my support group, lost her battle with ovarian cancer on Saturday. She will be truly missed. Hugs going out to her family and friends. She was an amazing woman who I enjoyed very much and who I had the pleasure of writing with in our Write Around Portland group. It won't be the same without her beautiful face smiling back at us in our support group. She always wore my favorite color, orange, and brightened up the room and my day. I hope she knows that I enjoyed walking in this world with her.

xoxox
Shauna

Happiness is....

Watching your 13 year old score his first goal ever in a soccer game and then scoring a second one as they go on to win 7-2! Also, watching him have fun, gain his confidence back, enjoy the respect of his teammates and find some of that passion that has been lost over the last two years. Getting cupcakes after the game in honor of someone's birthday doesn't hurt either!
Happiness is also watching your 9 year old daughter play the sport she loves with a smile on her face as they win 5-0. She didn't have any goal scoring opportunities today as she mostly played sweeper rather than her favorite, left wing.

Happiness is getting time for a quick nap before heading out to celebrate a dear friend's 50th birthday! It was a potluck Obama themed party and in lieu of gifts the birthday girl preferred donations to the campaign. I brought those frozen cream puffs that you find in the freezer section as my potluck contribution and they were a huge hit and were gone in a snap! Party favors were stickers and buttons in support of Obama. The birthday girl is definately passionate about her politics! I happened to win the raffle drawing - a cd set of Obama books on tape. Fun to win for a change! Maybe my luck is looking up!!! I'll run with that!

Happiness is also having nothing on the calendar for Sunday and getting to sleep in.

Happiness is working through the side effects of the chemo and starting to feel like myself again. Or as much like myself as I can these days.

Happiness is having the sun come out and chase away those silly little rain clouds that can follow us around at times.

Happiness is having such great friends and supporters as all of you out there cheering me on.

Happy Sunday to you all!
xoxox
Shauna

ps. Wasn't the Stand Up to Cancer program powerful???? And did you see the segment beforehand, with our dear friend Elizabeth Steiner demonstrating and speaking about the importance of breast exams and how to do them correctly? And did you see my support group sitting around the tables with our quilt in the background???? Can you believe 1 in 3 women will get cancer in their lifetime. Not good odds. Scary odds. I'm so proud of what they did last night to try and make a difference and to put all of that money towards research. Good stuff.

Stand Up to Cancer - edited

Tonight, Friday, September 5th, 2008, at 8:00pm there will be a huge star studded special on cancer awareness, Stand Up to Cancer (SU2C) on all three major networks, ABC, NBC and CBS. Check it out:

Stand Up to Cancer
Donate Here

Where the End of Cancer Begins...

Go to iTunes and download the star studded song "Stand Up".

Also, at 7:30pm on KATU ABC, there is a segment featuring some women from my support group who have been battling and surviving for a long time!

TGIF!

xoxo
Shauna

Back to School

1st Day of School, Wed. Sept. 3rd, 2008
Spencer 8th Grade
Kaelin 4th Grade

The Chemo Blues

Had chemo today. :( I can't tell you how sick of it I am. How much I've been dreading it all weekend. I just don't want to do it at all anymore!!! It's so old I tell you. Ugh. But I forced myself to go. To fight the fight. To go to battle. Wage war against those darn cancer cells. Not feeling much like a warrior these days I guess. Tired of being a warrior. I just want to go back to being me. :( The sad part is that this is me now. Me with cancer. Sux 2 B me today. :(

Missed Kaelin's Open House today because of chemo. Missed Spencer's orientation (not that there is much to miss since he's in middle school and wouldn't be caught dead with me). Just missed being in the hustle and bustle. Meeting the teachers. Seeing the kids after summer vacation. How much they've grown. Visiting with the parents and faculty. Taking photos. It was good that Dave got to go. But I always go. I missed it!!! Tomorrow is the official start of school. Can you believe it? Time flew.

Spencer had martial arts and Kaelin had her rhythmic gymnastics. So it's back to the crazy insane training schedules. Dave is at a loss for a basketball gym to do private lessons in right now, so he was available after school to drive, as well as my mom who usually has Monday and Tuesdays off. I'm thankful for that. By the way, if anyone knows of somewhere with gym space that does court rentals, let Dave (dave@daveimmel.com) know! It's going to affect our livelyhood, which is a bad thing if we don't get this problem solved and soon!

I hope you all have a great week. I'll try and find my happy face in my closet before I go out in public again. Wouldn't want to get anyone wet with the raincloud I'm carrying over my head right now. Got the Chemo Blues.

xxoxox
Shauna

p.s. How about them Bruins!!!!!!! Beating #18 Tennessee in OT!